FAQs
Am I Trans enough?
Yes. You are.
"Being transgender" is an umbrella term that encompasses a very wide range of identities. If you feel like it applies to you, you can use it.
Gender Spectrum
How to handle insensitive questions
Am I the only Transgender Person in Town?
No, you're not. The 2021 census found that there are at least 6000 transgender or gender non conforming people in Kent.
It isn't that transgender popularity is spreading, it is that we're being punished less for being our true selves. Although it might not feel like it lately, with the societal push back, we have more acceptance than previous generations ever had.
We need for society to keep moving in the right direction, so future generations can be accepted for who they truly are, without prejudice or discrimination.
Coming Out
The truth about coming out is that it is a continual process. First, you come out to yourself and accept this part of who you are. Every person's transition journey is different; it may be years before you take another step.
The next people to tell might be friends and family, if you feel safe to. Then your boss and co-workers. Or maybe your teacher or professor. Then larger social circles until you consider that everyone important to you knows.
But you will continue to meet new people and you'll probably come out to them too, if they're important to you. Don't worry, it gets easier, and you are not alone.
One Member's Coming Out Email
Hi All,
I’m transgender. No action necessary, I’m just putting it in writing to alleviate any awkwardness for those who have noticed already, enable open conversation if you’re interested, and to show the NHS when I eventually get through their waiting list.
If you have more questions, I’ve put together a FAQ page (attached), and <COMPANY> have done a more general page (also attached).
The key points for me are: She/her pronouns please, and I’m going by <NAME> to my friends. I will start presenting more feminine, but nothing dramatic. I’ll sort out my email address soon enough.
Thank you for your support,
<NAME>
Feel free to use this as a template for your own needs. Adapt it to your preferences. We advise you to keep it short and to the point, with a separate FAQ for those inevitable questions.
There are some key phrases within that email:
"No action necessary." - One transphobic push back often received is that it is a huge effort to remember someone's pronouns. It really isn't.
"I'm going by <NAME> to my friends" - Instead of asking permission to make a change, you're telling people what has already happened and if they want to be / stay your friend, they will do the same.
Administrative Stuff
Changing your name Deed Poll Template
ID Documents - Don't forget your Passport, Driving Licence, Bank Account, Pension, and Doctors
Gender Recognition Certificate (Section to be completed)
In England, the process requires: 2 years of documented evidence
Allies most Frequent Questions
Allies can have questions too, it's okay. Contact us if your question isn't answered here, and we can respond directly, and we'll add your question to this page for other allies.
How to avoid insensitive questions - Consider the phrase "Respect before understanding".
How does apathy hurt the transgender community?